Ever since I stopped working full-time, I sometimes get over-whelmed with a feeling of... emptiness. Today, I feel it acutely, again.
When I was working in Singapore, I always felt like quitting. The hours were crazy.. the work never went away no matter how many hours I put in.. the emails never stopped piling in.. the endless phone calls (Even I went on leave and turned my mobile to slient mode, I always checked it every so often to be sure I wasn't missing an "important" call).. the occasional unhappiness due to some nasty people.. the frustration due to stupid things being done.. Surely, I thought, life is not all about work. I need to do something else.
Then I stopped working full-time and moved to Beijing. It was so boring to be at home! My family and friends were in Singapore.. I didn't like the advertisements on TV (and there were plenty..).. I couldn't always be watching DVDs.. So, I decided to start working again. In Beijing, work is not as stressful, or as busy as in Singapore. But still, there was the frustration of working in a different language, a different culture..
Then, we moved back home. This time, I don't have the excuse of having no family and friends. Most of my family and friends are at home. And it has been nice to be able to catch up with them and spend time with them. But then.. mostly.. they are busy with their own life - be it studies or work. And this time, I don't have the excuse of having no activities to keep myself busy - I could bake, garden, do small handicrafts.. go shopping.. etc..
And so, as much as I hate to admit it.. I have to say.. I think I miss working. It is strange but true.
But since I have decided to stop working, perhaps it is time to really close that chapter of my life.
So, good bye Working Lady. Good bye.
Perhaps I'd see you in the future again. But perhaps not. In any case, it was nice having you around.