Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Friendly Advice


Since I came back to Singapore, each time I meet friends, or bump into friends, I'd hear at least one of the following, or all of the following:

"Oh.. you are back? When did you come back?"

"You are back? For good?"

"You mean you quit your job to come back?"

"Both of you quit?"

"Why? What's wrong with Beijing?"

I get quite used to these. Most of my friends ask these questions out of pure concern.. or surprise.

I understand totally.

Really. No problem at all.

I just have to get used to repeating myself like a parrot, explaining why we decided to come back (No special reason, is time to be back to be with family), explaining why I decided to leave my job (Again, no special reason, is time for a change) and so on...

Since I decided I will start my own business, again.. many friends ask very similar questions:

"What type of business?"

"Oh.. so different from what you were doing, isn't it?"

"Why? Your previous job pays well right?"

"Don't want to do accounting anymore?" (Only from people who don't really know me that well.. honestly, I don't know why everyone thinks that.. I NEVER worked in accounting in my life, except as an intern when I was in school. Really. If you read this blog, pls, don't ever ask me why I don't want to do accounting.. or auditing.. )

And almost everyone tries to give some sort of advice.

On how location will be very important...
on how tough life will be..
on how difficult it is..
on how I should target only certain customer segments..
on what they think of my idea..
and so on.

I appreciate all my friend's (and relatives, of course) concerns.. and I know that most of them genuinely care for me.

I do, really. And most of their comments, I believe, are right.

But honestly, at time.. I wish I get a lot less "advice".

Sometimes, I think a comment such as "Let me know if there's anything I can help" is so much better than a million words of advice.

When we go through changes in our lives, all we need sometimes is a friendly smile, a gentle word of encouragement and a kind help.

I need also to learn to pay less "lip-service" and learn to be really there for my friends and relatives. It may not always be the easier way (It is usually so much easier to just chat) but I believe it is the right thing to do.

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