Meeting Brick Walls

I have a simple dream.

(Actually, I have many. But this is one of them)

I dream of having my own little sit-down cafe.. where students can catch up with one another after school.. where friends meet up for chit-chat on weekends.. where siblings share a dessert and update each other over a cup of coffee.. where tired folks come in after work and get a little refreshment that keeps going.. and where families come in for a lazy weekend brunch and family bonding time..

And where I get to cook and bake only stuff I like to eat.. and feel like cooking or baking each day...

One day, I'd open this laissez-faire cafe of mine..

Coming back to reality, I have decided a few months back that I will start small in my F&B endeavours.

I'd open a take-away F&B counter somewhere in this small island. My concept is ready and as in my menu... many things require fine tuning.. but they are more or less in place..

But but but... I can't find a shop space.

They are either too big.. or too expensive.. or too quiet.. or just simply not suitable.

But mostly, I just get the same response - "No space available.. til at least Q3 of next year.."

I will not.. and must not let this brick wall stop me.

For as Carnegie Mellon Professor Randy Pausch said in his final lecture:

"Brick walls are there for a reason. They let us prove how badly we want things."

"The brick walls are there to stop people who don't want it badly enough. They're there to stop the other people."

I have to get over this brick wall to get a step closer to this particular dream of mine. There will be so many more ahead of me in future.

Good Investment Advice

I received a piece of good investment advice yesterday.

It came from a wise young friend.

I have been frustrated and discouraged over finding a location for my shop.

Many people have told me to take my time.

"You are in no hurry."

"It's important to take time..."

"These things are like that."

But still, I felt frustrated and a bit helpless.. and sometimes, I wonder if I'm just wasting my time. And I can't help but think that maybe.. I should go back to work and be busy like everyone else around me.

This friend gave me a new perspective - All that time I have on my hands can be invested into doing other things..

"Invest your time with God. Spend more time reading the Bible and praying.. Investment in God will pay off more than any other thing you invest in."

Friendly Advice

Since I came back to Singapore, each time I meet friends, or bump into friends, I'd hear at least one of the following, or all of the following:

"Oh.. you are back? When did you come back?"

"You are back? For good?"

"You mean you quit your job to come back?"

"Both of you quit?"

"Why? What's wrong with Beijing?"

I get quite used to these. Most of my friends ask these questions out of pure concern.. or surprise.

I understand totally.

Really. No problem at all.

I just have to get used to repeating myself like a parrot, explaining why we decided to come back (No special reason, is time to be back to be with family), explaining why I decided to leave my job (Again, no special reason, is time for a change) and so on...

Since I decided I will start my own business, again.. many friends ask very similar questions:

"What type of business?"

"Oh.. so different from what you were doing, isn't it?"

"Why? Your previous job pays well right?"

"Don't want to do accounting anymore?" (Only from people who don't really know me that well.. honestly, I don't know why everyone thinks that.. I NEVER worked in accounting in my life, except as an intern when I was in school. Really. If you read this blog, pls, don't ever ask me why I don't want to do accounting.. or auditing.. )

And almost everyone tries to give some sort of advice.

On how location will be very important...
on how tough life will be..
on how difficult it is..
on how I should target only certain customer segments..
on what they think of my idea..
and so on.

I appreciate all my friend's (and relatives, of course) concerns.. and I know that most of them genuinely care for me.

I do, really. And most of their comments, I believe, are right.

But honestly, at time.. I wish I get a lot less "advice".

Sometimes, I think a comment such as "Let me know if there's anything I can help" is so much better than a million words of advice.

When we go through changes in our lives, all we need sometimes is a friendly smile, a gentle word of encouragement and a kind help.

I need also to learn to pay less "lip-service" and learn to be really there for my friends and relatives. It may not always be the easier way (It is usually so much easier to just chat) but I believe it is the right thing to do.

Building castles in the air

English idiom: To build castles in the air, or to build castles in Spain
Definition: To daydream or dream of things that are not attainable

Photos taken in Tours, France in Summer 2006

Sometimes, I wonder if I build too many castles in the air. Certainly I have learnt from past experiences that I am sometimes too positive when it comes to estimating workloads..

Especially that of my own.

On one hand, I'm trying to start up a new business... where there are about a zillion things I don't know and need to learn. On the other hand, I have some contract work.. in areas I'm familiar with.. working with people I like.

The Husband thinks I need to be more focused and am over-stretching myself.

I think that multi-tasking is good for me.. and think that I can cope. (I mean.. I really do have all these free time on my hands, don't I... Can still blog, for one..)

He thinks that sometimes to move on, we have to give up certain things.

I dream of running my business.. and doing contract work here and there on a freelance basis.

The husband is usually right, of course... But but... Is it really not possible to have the best of both worlds?

Adventure, Incorporated

OK, I've done it.

I've gone and incorporated a company where The Husband and I are shareholders, which is true because both of us are investing our money and efforts into this thing.

And I've made myself the director and The Husband is now officially my secretary. (The reality is often the other way around though.)

I feel quite thrilled, even though it's just receiving an email from ACRA about the company being officially incorporated. Plus we don't even have anything substantial yet.

But it is a baby step towards a new adventure.

Nearing the point of no return

I had many dreams since young.

One was to to start my own business.

In uni, I dreamt of a little cafe, tucked in a quiet neighbourhood area.Mothers would come in in the morning, when their children are in school, enjoying a little gossip over some cake and hot tea. Students would visit my little dream cafe after school, and have a glass of iced coffee whilst discussing their school projects. In the evenings, cousins or friends would drop by, enjoying a bit of dinner or just some drinks. On certain occassions, the cafe would be closed for a special birthday for a grandmother, or a special anniversary.

Even before graduation, I knew my dream wasn't going to come through, since I accepted a job at a reputable consulting firm.

But then, I had too many other dreams that didn't come true - including becoming president of the republic of Singapore, having an elder brother and so on... So I didn't make too much of it.

I've worked for many years since graduation. But this particular little dream of having my own business stayed with me over the years.

Over time, the idea of a cafe changed and evolved.

And now, after all these years, I'm standing near to the point of no return - registration of my own little company.

It's almost like deciding to get married. Only I didn't feel that worried and nervous at that time. But doing my own business is a big change, to me at least... It'd be unlike leading teams, implementing systems, managing projects and timelines..

Part of me is feeling jittery inside. A million "what-ifs", mostly negative, are running around inside my head.

Part of me is feeling proud of myself. Proud of myself for stepping out of my comfort zone. Proud of myself for taking that step to change my own life.

For better or for worst, it'd be a new chapter of my life.